Elder Owen Bush

Monday, February 14, 2022

February 14, 2022

 

Subject: cool story bro


Ladies and gentlemen, this is a good one.

Behold the great missionary Owen did make an account of his time in the city of Roanoke rapids in the land of North Carolina. 

Thus it came to pass 

That. 

We did taketh the bane of all the pre-workouts. (Which, if you didn't know is pretty much a fruity powder that makes you extra fun. And you take it pre the workout) 

Anyways thus Owen and his companion did scoop a heaping pile of caffeine filled powder into their water. And it was exceedingly rich. 

Anyway you get the picture, we drive to the gym,

 I deadlift 400 pounds,

 we drive back. 
Slow Tuesday for Elder Bush.

what can I say. 

Actually I was very low key 
                                  high key 
                                  pUmPEd 

And I even made Elder severson take a video but he put a weird filter where it looks like I have a really hard time doing the lift, so I won't show you guys. 

Speaking of taking videos of me being uncomfortable I have a grand story for you.

So.

(prepare yourself, it's gonna get rough)


It all starts with me and Elder severson and me trying to get super ripped. - 

I promise that's not the only thing I talk about, it's just the most fun to talk about- 

So me and Elder s. are on a calorie deficit diet. And what diet stands for is "do I eat that?" Because you're always tryna figure out what's loq calorie and high protein. And it's just a pain in the body building, squat flexing, buttocks. 
So we were at Walmart. and I remember my comp saying something like "Pickles have no calories" so I tell myself in my head "hey." "Pickles would be good I think." I also happened to say it out loud and Elder s. looks at me and he goes: "yes". I could tell the old noodle was cooking up some ideas. 
Probably something like: 

eat pickle= Abs. 

So we waltz down to the aisle where they sell the stuff and of course we have to buy the big old 100lb jar of those things. Also cool thing. If you look on a jar of pickels it says Mt. Olive. And Mt. Olive is actually in my last zone. I knew the guy who served there. His name is elder vance. We always called him and his comp the pickle boys.

Anyways so we're back at the house with the pickles right, and I had the splendid idea to take one out and eat it. 
And it was gud. 
Then I had another splendid idea. Take another pickle out of the jar, 
place it on a piece of paper   (For contrast) 

And 


leave it on someone's porch.

Now I know what you're thinking. 
"Hey. 

That's not a very missionary thing to do. 
You should be more dignified."
Well you heard it here first folks: you're totally right. Probably shouldn't have done it. 

BUT

it happened. 
And now it's a good story. 
And I repented. 


So. Back to the pickle porch pirates. 
Me and Elder s. threw on some hoodies and snuck over to a neighbors house. We picked a nice juicy house with a bunch of lights on, and cars in the driveway. You could tell they were having a family reunion or something. Perfect. 
Elder s. hides behind a tree and starts videotaping the action. I sneak up to the porch. As I pass the window I confirm that there is a ton of people all sitting around talking and laughing. If I'm caught I'm dead. 
Ok so I place the paper onto the porch. By the way I have written the word "pickle" in pen right on the top as for there to be no confusion. The pickle is then placed on the paper, and the paper on the porch, right in eyesight to the door opener. 

I knocked real hard and booked it into the neighbors driveway. I slid, baseball style under the pickup and watched as chaos ensued. 
 

15 seconds passed. I was worried no one heard me. But then, boom. 
The first lady opens the door and I see some confusion. She's looking around to see someone. Eventually her eyes drift downwards to see the pickle. 

She is in utter shock and screams/laughs for the rest of them to come see. One by one the people come out and see the pickle and nobody has a good answer as to why it's there. They all ask the first lady what it is and she has no better answer then to tell each one of them: "it's a pickle". "It was on the porch".


My comp and I are dying laughing and also scared they will see us. 
By now the whole family is outside completely perplexed at what has caused this beautiful visit. One guy came out with a flashlight and I kid you not said "WHO HAS THE AUDACITY" I was like bruh. It's a pickle. Another lady said :hey maybe call the cops..." and for a second I was scared but then another lady laughed, she said "what would we say to the cops?" After about 5 minutes things calmed down and Elder s and I ran back to the house to laugh our heads off. 

It was a good time. 

Don't worry. 
I won't do it again. 


On another note, we've been seeing TONS  of miracles with people and finding. Me and sevies have found almost 50 people in the past month and are really sorting through the area book. We're working a lot with the members and getting their trust. 
Seriously all we see as missionaries are miracles. I've seen a lot of how God can create beautiful things with imperfect people like ourselves. And it just makes me want to keep being an instrument in His hands. 

Love the play
Love the work 
And Love you. 
--  Elder B.




at February 14, 2022
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